Saturday, July 23, 2011

When the President calls: PICK UP THE PHONE! A Hot Summer’s Nightmare

It’s a beautiful day all across America. Normal people are doing business in their normal way. Unbeknownst to the benevolent citizenry several nuclear ballistic missile launching submarines have taken up station off of our coastlines with intent that is malevolent

At the same time in China hundreds of highly trained hackers go to work. They seize control of the entire worldwide web but take special attention to the infrastructure and websites of media organizations. They have a singular mission. They are going to spread nothing but disinformation in advance of their coming attack.

China has decided to go all Rocko and Lefty on us. We owe a debt and they have come to collect.

Meanwhile in Washington D.C. the President has received some disturbing intelligence from his military and intelligence officials. Through the use of our NSA and other security assets wind of the Chinese plan has come his way.

He immediately places all the defense aspects of our country on their highest level of alert. He looks at the earnest Air Force officer who carries the football of his war fighting abilities sighs and tells him let’s go. The President is immediately and expeditiously ferried from the White House to his waiting Marine One copter for a break neck ride to Andrews and Air Force One.

Plans for the continuation of government many decades in the making and perfection go into effect. The Vice President and Senate majority leader are called. They are immediately whisked away by convoys to secret and separate underground locations. The members of the Supreme Court are notified and taken under care by military officers who scatter the seeds of our judiciary far and wide. Justices are flown to 9 different states and secret locations.

At the same time the Speaker of the House of Representatives opens up the website to his only trusted news source Fake News. He notices a very provocative headline.

“Barry’s Slick Chinese Tricks”

It is a very well crafted argument. It discusses how the caver in chief Kenyan Marxist threat to all that is American and holy is yet again about to deceive the country with some phony “wag the tail” war to distract the American people from his parties’ righteous fight against old and poor people having Social Security and Medicare.

After having digested the article an aide comes to the Speaker of the Peoples House, and tells him that the President is on the line with an urgent call.

The Speaker tells the aide, I’m not playing his games. Tell the President I’ll get back with him.

We perform very well in the coming attack.

Back in the 1980’s when a billion dollars was a billion dollars Ronald Reagan sequestered several of those billions to a new and very secret program. In total secrecy following American Presidents continue to feed the new and publically unknown technologies.

Of the 36 ICBM’s launched only 2 survive the barrage of space based laser and kinetic weapons defenses. 1 splashes harmlessly in the sea, but the other unfortunately was a leadership missile and air bursts over our nation’s capital.

It is a very severe blow, however with our leadership evacuation plans having had a few hours to go in effect the major organs of our government are more than intact. Only one branch of government was affected by the decapitation attack. When the President of the United States called he didn’t have the courtesy to pick up the phone. It was the very least of our losses.

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